Believe Manifesto

Tonight I am writing to you around 7pm central time, I’m already in my PJ’s, the kids are in bed (yep you heard that right!) and I just had to share my heart with you all about some of the women I find myself surrounded by these days.

I started thinking about this after talking to my friend and shop owner last week about my blog, and why I started it. I was very honest with her and I told her that the reason that I started this blog was because in a season of my life about 5-6 years ago, I was in a season of life where I didn’t have a lot of encouragement. I didn’t see much hope when I looked around. I had a FEW amazing women in my life, but that was it. I didn’t have this “tribe” of women so many speak of. So I decided to do something about it. I knew that God had laid this blog on my heart, and that he was saying, if you want to see a change, BE THE CHANGE SARAH! So I got really brave, and my stomach really hurt, but I did it anyway. And I started this little blog, with no followers.

A little later I started using the blog some for bible studies and somehow through just sharing what I wanted to share for my bible study girls, people started following. I didn’t even know how to tag posts yet, or add categories, I just wrote what was on my heart and shared it. During that time God had sent my first angel to join the other few I had cheering me on. Brianna was like a glass of water on my walk through the dessert. Even though we lived 5 hours apart, we encouraged each other. She encouraged what I was doing by leading bible studies, and on my blog. We encouraged each other as moms. She was my big mama during the breast feeding days, but my rock during the nursing strike with Coen. She has shown up huge during deep, meaningful conversations over the last 5 years. She is an angel among us.

Around the same time I switched jobs, and I ended up working at a different branch of the bank where I worked and met a new friend named Whitney. She is a fantastic listener. And although some things about our lives are complete opposites, I had found a sister in Christ, and God gave her to me as a kick stand if you will to hold me up when I felt like I was falling onto the cold hard ground. She doesn’t always get my crazy ideas, but she always cheers me on in everything I do. She also doesn’t take crap from me. She calls me out if I am not doing something that serves me and my family. And I love that. She is an angel among us.

Around the same time that I was in the desert…looking for anyone…someone who I could relate to, to talk to, to connect with, God led me back to a friend I had met a little longer back and we became reconnected! This was a start of what I like to tell my husband a “crock pot” friendship. Some friends you meet and you are instantly just joined at the hip, others develop more slowly in pace, but are just as amazing, dear and impactful. This was Hannah. She found herself in motherhood, and suddenly she was this rock of a first mother that I looked up to in awe as a mother of 2. Then when I had Coen, she became like a lifeline to me. I needed non talc baby powder? She called and had some waiting for me at the counter. I had all the fears and all the problems breastfeeding…she was there cheering me on the whole way. I needed a meal after my surgery, she was there. Today we were having lunch and as she sat across from me, I told her how hard this motherhood thing feels lately. How I feel like a bad mom a lot of days. How I LOOSE it sometimes and it all feels too much. Yet even as I am saying it, I know she 100% gets it. She is right there in the trenches with me. She said, you need to give yourself a little more GRACE and realize it WILL GET BETTER. Sweet Jesus did I need to hear those words today. She is an angel among us.

A little later, I met a sweet southern magnolia at an Arbonne event named Ashley. At the time we met, we didn’t know it but we already had 2 friends in common, and I had actually gone to high school with her husband. Go figure. This was another crock pot friendship, that didn’t truly deepen until God decided it was time for Derick and I to share some of our deepest struggles as a couple with her and her husband. Sharing our story acted as a catalyst for them. It helped them to hang on. But in return, I was able to have someone who I can call up while I drink my coffee. I know she is drinking her coffee, and we talk about all the things. These moments of solidarity between her and I fill my cup and keep me going through the rest of the week. We always share how God is working in our lives and where he is leading us next. Ashley has got a servant’s heart and has been diving deep into her church and helping others see what serving truly looks like. She is an angel among us.

A few months ago I found myself caught between a rock and a hard place. Daycare for Coen was NOT working out. (He punched one of the daycare ladies in the face the very first day…) So my niece started watching him in our home, then a short while later, she had to return to work full time. I had already used all of my help I could ask for when I was recuperating from my surgery so I didn’t have a lot of options. My mom and Derick’s mom helped us out and watched him 3 days a week for a few weeks, but I needed to find someone ASAP. So a family friend recommended Courtney. My, did this sweet sister ease mamas heart. From the get go, she felt like she was family. Coen felt right at home and went to her right away like he had known her his whole life. Today I picked him up for the last day before Christmas break and oh my lands did my heart swell full up! She had done Christmas crafts with him today. He made a tiny little wreath (ornament), a Santa picture with Cheerios, and a hand print salt ornament. Basically my heart swelled, then exploded. Mrs. Uncrafty here has never made any ornaments with her kids ever so anything hand made that is personalized– is basically pure gold in my eyes. She sent all of this plus some goodies (a Christmas bear with his name on it) in a stocking with his name on it. Tears you all…tears of joy! Just when I feel like all of humanity has teamed up to steal my joy, hate on my jokes, and balk at my prayers…God delivers this sweet sister in to our lives to lift us up and care for Coen like he is her own.

Then there are the angels that just keep angeling (I just made that up) Sam, Rachele, Sara, Mindy, Jennifer and many others. All of these women have blessed my life in a huge way over the past 5-6 years. In a season where I felt no hope, God sent me all kinds of blessings. He sent me all kinds of women to lift me up and to bring joy in my life. These women have all given me the hope I needed to keep going and not give up on my goals.

Be an angel for someone around you friends. They might just need it more than you know.